Congratulations! (Long post. You got time? Cool.)

I would like to congratulate myself on my Convocation recently. To mama and abah also. I made it finally! Alhamdulillah. After 5 years of hardship and ranting and ups and downs my university life has finally come to the end. *there's something in my eyes*. Well, it is always a mixed feeling. I am glad that I made it through but at the same time, I am still going to miss my student life. 5 years went so fast. As long as I can remember, I still have not done my tutorials properly. It's either I did it at the eleventh hour or I can never get it right. So much to do but so little time. I think that it was some sort of motto I live in during uni days. HAHAHA. Of course nobody else was to blame except for me. I get myself busy with co-curricular activities. Hence, the race against time. I also have this resolution of getting As for my subject and study as hard and as smart as I can so that I can improve my pointer when it comes to new semester. Yeap as you have guessed and I have guessed when it comes in the middle of the semester, I can only be thankful if I pass all the subjects at the end of the sem. Getting As would be a bonus. HAHAHA. I have my regrets but I am thankful for so much other things in my life.

My participation in co-curricular activities in one of the things that I am happy with. I always enjoy life outside classroom. Heeee. I remember my mom told me I don't want to do my homework at the age of 7 (if I'm not wrong) because I told her I am smart and I already know that. Well, I have to write my ABCs repeatedly when I already know my ABCs since I was 3. Make sense why I don't want to do my homework yes? But in Uni case, I told myself that I can only love and do Accounting that much and any extra work done would be pointless because I will still not be able to score more. Sometimes I want to beat myself so hard because I have limited myself. But anyhow, that was the decision I made. So I have to live with it. SO, back to co-curricular activities, Sekretariat Sekolah@MMU was my platform to get into all the event management things. I have learnt a lot from here - teamwork, friendship, relationship - you name it. Though I do not participate in it anymore, it is still dear to me. All the best to the legacy.

I wish all those who graduated best in career and life. And for my friends hope that we keep in touch and see you soon. InsyaAllah.

Love,
Farhana.

Howdy Do?

Heeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy there :) Hugs and kisses. I miss this. Long time no?

I HAVE to do this. I have to write, I have to blog. I feel my writing skill has gone really bad. It's hard for me to construct a proper sentence. I've mentioned this before right? I feel that the words are clogged inside my head and my fingers freeze when I wanted to write them because it's HARD~!!! Anyways here's to a new start. Hopefully I'll be consistent. Lol. Hmmm... So what's up?

I have finally graduated after 5 struggling years in Uni. Yeay me :) What? Wait... Struggling ke? Hahaha... Yes of course! But it was fun though. Although I have experienced a little bit of bitterness every now and then, it was normal peeps. Life is full of ups and downs right? Now I am currently looking for jobs. Hope that I get lucky ;)

So both of my younger sister and brother has all grown up. One is taller than me but me don't care that much because I am tall (enough). I still somehow maintained my weight though. Still underweight. 5 years and still in my 40s. I think I can hardly do anything about it. My brother, I expect him to be taller than me and I'm not surprised if it is in a few months. He is currently in Perlis, memorizing the holy Quran at one of tahfiz schools there. He feels that our education system is not challenging enough and hence, he seeks adventure there. My younger sister is going to continue her study in Uni soon. Awww... My younger siblings are all grown up and I want to cry now. May Allah ease their journey obtaining knowledge. My one and only older sister is currently working in KL in a development company. It's everything that she wants from a company. Lucky her!

So my parents are awesome as always. Getting older but still blessed with good health and happy marriage. Alhamdulillah :) And... they keep asking me to find work. Hahaha. It's not that I'm not finding one. But really slowly. Hey I went to career fair, if that wasn't good enough. I want to stay at home for a longer time since I was so busy with exams, assignment and event during the sem break. So yeah... I'm here mom and dad, if you need me! After this Im going out again ;) So better use me while I'm available ;P

Me and Khairul, we are boring and awesome as always. We are currently, if you may, in a long distance relationship (Subang Jaya - Cyberjaya) ;P. Got to see each other at least once a week or whenever we wanted to. Lol. He's currently doing his fyp and since I'm still looking for jobs, weekdays are still available for meet up. Miss seeing him everyday though. Friends are great. Some of them already landed a job. We still contact through Whatsapp but catch up sesh is kinda hard and only during weekends. But we gonna see each other during convocation sooonn :)

So that's about it for now. I know it's waaaayyyy to late but I would like to wish Muslims around the world happy Eid ul Fitri. May Allah bless us always.

Last but not least, I would like to pat myself on the back for typing this whole new post. :) More are coming insyaAllah.

Love,
F.

When it only amount to this

I don't really like having dispute with people. I don't like to pick up fight with anyone except Khairul. Hahaha. Joke. I don't like it  now more because it will hurt my jaw every time I think of the moment I get hurt with people's remarks or what they have done or not done to me. Yes, hurt my jaw. Rasa lenguh. Because I often clinch my teeth when I'm stress. Thinking of it making me stress and... woa wait! Im going in circle explaining... Never mind. IT's just HURT physically and mentally. Period.

What is more frustrating is that the urge want to stand up for myself or to hurt them back only amount to this: writing in blog which not that those people follow me or read my blog. Is there anyone still reading my blog? Haha. It's like I'm scolding my teddy bear and the only thing he do is keep smiling and all those yelling and screaming and explaining to him only gives me minimal satisfaction. Ouh how I love to scream out those foul words to them and hurt them back. But then again, I don't like having dispute with people. What would happen to my image if I responded like a mad person. No I don't like it either. And even if I would explain it in a well manner, things not going to be the same again. I'm afraid of jeopardizing relationship I guess. Hmmm... And the other thing that I usually did was told Khairul about it. I told him the exact words I'm going to said to the person I'm discontent with - if i'm ever going to tell.

So, I just can't really you know fight back. Maybe because I think the outcome will always be negative. If the outcome is positive would it be a waste not to response back. I did response. But very diplomatically.

So here it goes:

1) Please open your eyes and heart and know me better. ;) You'll be glad that I'm not the one that cares (to those kind of thing). I'm not kepoci. Seriously, I have a humongous number of things to do that makes me happy rather then search for stories to tell. The fact that I DON'T EVEN tell stories. I only joke around with you and it seems to me that you're the filler and I just play along, the killer, the puncher. Masih diplomatik. Haha. My policy is if people want to tell me anything I listen and JUST listen. If people don't want to share their stories, even if I know about it briefly, I won't force them to tell. It's their right to remain silence about it. Maybe before you point out flaws to other people, you can reflect your self first. Sometimes the root to the problem is you yourself :)

2) The previous sem is hard and challenging and I can assure you that I really have worked for it. For me the result is satisfying, more than I expected. Ouh if you could only share the fear with me. I know it's NOT A LOT well for you. Don't you feel like asking how is it for me? For me it's A LOT. A simple encouraging remarks would do. And I don't really ask for rewards. Things. If you want to give that really all up to you. I'm not asking. I only ask for meaningful support. That's it. I'm simple like that and you guys more than any other person knows that. Love you guys, nevertheless.

3) Please don't mind I'm not eating with you, accompany you every where, or not doing something with you. I'm like this. I move fast and independent. I don't want people to follow me and I can't stick to other people's schedule because I have a plan of my own. If you want me you then have to keep up. Well, that sounds harsh no? Let's just say that I have my own plan. Yes, I'm aware of the boyfriend issue. I would love each and every one of you to have your love ones nearby. And and and tell me if you don't want to see him everyday when he's just next door, okay? Apart from that, I will try do my best to spend time with you guys okay? ^.^v

And sadly, it only amount to this.

Regards,
Fana Ayam.

Haaaa lidaaaayyyyy

Yeppie :) 3 weeks holiday. Rasa MMU macam generous pulak bagi cuti banyak2..hewhew :3 Anyways, the first week dah habis sebab join event. Same old same old yet special Sekolah@MMU. This time dekat Kelantan. Akhirnya, saya dah conquer satu peninsular setelah 21 tahun hidup di bumi Malaysia ni. Next stop Sarawak.

Cadangnya sekarang nak lipat kain. Sambil tengok movie/pasang lagu kat laptop. Tapi kebiasaan la kan kalau bukak laptop tu susah nak move on buat benda lain. So end up check out fb/twitter yang dah setahu... sehari je tak bukak. lama la jugak tu kan sebab during semester almost 24 hours bukak laptop study/assignment punya pasai. Lepas tu blogging sbb dah lama tak blog. I can never really function when there is people around. Sometimes. So tak jadi lipat kain. Esok je la jawabnya... Esok kena:

Beli groceries
Basuh kain
Lipat kain
Sort and buang buku

Cakap pasal buku, baru sekarang boleh lepas rindu baca novel. I love my sweet sweet sweet time cuddling with books (bukan buku teks). Sebab rindu ni la habis tergendala all the house chores. Rindu sangat. So say whatever to house chores... Hahaha. Cuti ni habis satu novel pun okay. Dari bila entah asyik bukak novel baru... baca separuh jalan lepas tu tinggal. and then repeat. So azam cuti ni habis kan novel. Sebuah je... I miss painting, sketching as well :/ Tapi tak bawak balik barang2 pun sebab tau tak kan sempat punya buat di rumah. So bawak balik my 'inspire' spiral notebook tu je and a pen.

Masa lain plan nak buat spring cleaning. PLAN. In sha Allah buat. Just clean almari buku je. So yeah. No biggie. Tapi takut distracted pulak. Anyways, tadi saya dapat idea nak buat notebooks. mcm vintage like note book. :3 yeay me. kita tgk nnt berhasil ke tak. tak sabar.

Okay nak pi tidoq kan adik2. Walaupun dah besar still kena teman kan tido. So what I do usually saya akan ceritakan kisah Pak Musang and Mak Ayam. Classic. Tak tau korang tahu ke tak. The same story everytime diorang nak tido. Mcm bonding session sebelum tido. Walaupun cerita yang sama saya ubah sikit2 ikut keadaan semasa. im cool liddat ^.^v

Ok peeps. Toodles :3

No pressure people

Assalamualaikum and hello :)

It's been a long time no? Happy Ramadan to all muslims :)  May this Ramadan bring barakah to all of you. Amin~

Yeah, so... how do I start? It's all in my head but it is kinda hard to put it in sentence. Actually I do have the sentence in my head - the main points. It's just the introduction part. We always have problem with introduction right? So, never mind, here we go. So recently I realized (just realized) that I have been under a lot of pressure. I have no time for 'trivia' stuff - the fact that they are essential part of me like blogging and doing art stuff. I have to keep up with my own schedule. I somehow have A LOT of things to do. I barely had time for myself. So I forgive myself for not having time doing the fun things because I 'don't have' time and I take 6 subjects for this semester so I have to keep up. Ironically, not very much 'things' can be settled on time. Since, time is insufficient for me. I think I have manage time well but it was not fruitful. I don't know. I'm not sure where it went wrong and I don't even want to know the reason - well, not yet, not now. So yeah that makes a part of my stress life.

Recently (also) I've disappointed because things doesn't turn out to my favor. I've been working for that 'thing' all my heart out - it makes to my top priority. It's definitely my passion, my stage. I believe I am the best thespian on stage and best player on the field. But, as I mentioned things didn't happen the way that I want it to be. I am disappointed, defeated. I know I'm the best (waaahhh... confident gitew) but just not my rezeqi I guess. Mungkin kena reflect diri sendiri balik. Confident tu penting tapi over-confident tu tak bagus. I tend to look down on poeple. Rasanya sebab buat kerje tak ikhlas kot. Niat tak betulkan... tu la jadinya. Sebab nak tunjukkan kat orang yang kita ni bagus. Everything is competition. Then, the EGO comes in. I kinda actually stop having fun to prove myself worthy. Aduh, stress -.-" Lupa pulak you can never satisfy people. And nothing is certain. So yeah, tersentak jap.. sentak ye bukan sentap. It's okay to expect something but if it doesn't turn out like how you want it to be DON'T DESPAIR. Because something better might awaits you. Lain kali jangan sombong dan takbur. Faham adik2? Buat kerja biar ikhlas dan haraplah ganjaram dari Allah dan bersangka baiklah selalu. So pengajaran for me I guess.

So, I kinda take everything slowly now. Tak nak tamak sangat. Hahaha... But I still need to rush things though but not too rush. I'll take my time appreciating small things that give me significant comforts. I really want to enjoy things that need to be done and I will. Kalau nampak saya stress cakap kat saya 'GO GET A LIFE!' pastu simbah air. Tapi kalau nak kena tumbuk buat la... hahah. Joking! But the simbah air part tu tak yah buat la.

So, yeah that's about it. Sorry ayat berterabur. Lama dah tak mengarang. Selalu tulis essay je for assignment. Nak buat ayat mudah pun tak reti dah. Huhu. Next post in sha Allah pasal kucing ^._.^ me love cat.

Until then, see ya in the next post.

Regards,
Farhana

Stop stoping

Salam and hello everyone.

Sitting here on my 'bed' - my travelling mat and typing this. My comforting moment would be when I Imagine or for real sitting comfortably in a couch, my hair tied up into a bun and the fringe decorate my forehead, touches the frame of my spectacle. With my favorite book cupped in my hands. I feel geeky and cute already :P Accompanied by a mug of hot chocolate. Very winter-ish. I enjoy letting my thoughts have their own way for a while, let my imagination running wild.When I do this recently, with no book in my hands, just lie down staring at the wall, a thought came to me that what's really stopping you from doing something is you yourself. 

Take me for example. Last two weeks I have given a chance to be an emcee for a grand award giving ceremony. As I mentioned in previous post, I have been longing to be the emcee for the ceremony since I attended the last year award giving ceremony. So this year, it's like a dream comes true. I got the offer. But at first I hesitant (can you believe that?). I've been wanting it for so long and I hesitated. Annoying much. Reason being, it's far too late (not sure for what). I got the offer 4 days before the event day. I even said to a friend that I readily to give up the offer because it is far too late to... be prepared I guess. And plus I don't have appropriate dress to wear. So yeah I guess, 4 days is not enough for me to find the right dress. Pfft. Diva much. Hahaha. But yeah, because I have another event in the same week, so I have to be at the grand hall for rehearsal. So no time for me to search for the right dress. Yeah, I have to be there all the time and no time to go anywhere because I am too dedicated (read with sarcasm)...lol. In short, I'm still thinking about the offer but I'm ready to give up. I really have that problem of wanting something so much and in the end, when I can get that thing, I give it up. Problem much. Much much.

But then, I talked this over with my sweetheart. He said that not to worry about the dress and he said that I have that thing in me, being an emcee. And yes I normally doubted myself. He reminds me that I wanted this so much since last year and don't let this petty things get in a way or I will regret for giving it up. He said, we will find time to find the right dress for the ceremony. And we did. And my mom & dad drive all the way from Subang to deliver her gold skirt for me to wear for the ceremony. My sayang also mentioned, don't be afraid of screwing things up (not badly) just normal mistake for a first timer like me and don't be hard on yourself if screws happens...Haha. Kind of first time for me for emceeing big event like this in university. I used to be emcee at high school for quite a number of events; Teacher's Day and that sorts. In the end, I take up the offer. And so there was I on Friday evening at the grand hall, again, for rehearsal. So I met my emcee partner and I started to feel inferior. I saw him last year and he was good. He has this big afro hair and I think that's an extra feature to appear more charismatic and firendly.I don't really have 'extra feature' and I am so thin I'm afraid that they might confuse me with a mic stand during the ceremony...lol. Exegerate much. I get nervous during the rehearsal, tongue tied so people keep asking me to relax. But they are making me more nervous. :S

So that night, I freaked out a little. Okay, I cried over the phone with my sayang and yeah I was sad because of something else too. I wanted to follow my parents to Australia for my sister graduation. So I cried. And I think the shawl doesn't match with the skirt. I feel inferior because I'm not good as my emcee partner. So I'm afraid I ruined the ceremony. Worries much. In my own Malay term I called this as 'serabut' which literally means messy but for me it means there's a lot of things that I'm thinking of and then I worry too much. Sayang said calm down, and I'm thinking too much. If my emcee partner is good then get advice or tips from him how to be a good emcee and observe him, learn from him. And so, I took the advice but still worried a little. So Saturday comes; day, rehearsal, night, the ceremony commence. And Alhamdulillah I did pretty well - I give myself 3 out of 5 stars. Some said that I did pretty well as a first timer :3. And my shawl suits the skirt and I did not end up wearing all black with gold shawl. I did my own make-up, fyi :3 In the end, interesting experience, dreams come true, not give up the thing that I wanted so much. Self enrichment. It really boost my confidence to try new things.

To point out, whatever my sweetheart says to me; don't give up, don't let challenges bring you down and all that sort is something that I know, something that I can think of. Maybe all  I need is some sort of reassurance and support so that I won't stop myself from doing what I really long to do and this is what I want and I must work for it and it is not impossible. I think that's a function of the ones you love. They support, advice, motivate and even scold you to make it a better person, to help you to achieve your dream. So here I would like once again to thank all individuals that giving me support and especially to my sayang. HOW on earth you can be soooo optimistic? It's annoying sometimes. If it wasn't for you I might be sitting there at the dinner table still wishing that I am the one emceeing the ceremony. So thank you and love you :)

So this is me last year just taking pictures with the emcee, and on the right is me emceeing with him.

Dream come true ey?

This is my chubby, supportive, optimistic sweetheart 

I put your picture in my blog so BE PROUD now... hahaha

I think it is not fair. But since relationship is consist of two people. And both sides matters. So I have to make sacrifices. For both of us. I don't like it. But I have to.

Burung hantu

Omputeh kata OWL.

Salam and hello everyone. Lama dah tak blogging... *tiup habuk. Now I'm back just to keep it updated. Yes, as you all know, well, maybe some of you don't, I am really into sketching/drawing/painting and anything to do with that la. So I have produce a few artworks. Mainly drawing of cartoons and of course I asked people around to get their feedback. Most of them say 'okay', 'cantik'. If you want to see my artwork you guys can check out my instagram: hannasaif. So yeah, day by day, i love it more and more. I have one sketch book (the old one) and new sketching notebook which on the cover I wrote 'Inspire' in my very own cursive writing :P I also save whatever idea that comes to my mind in my phone memo. I collected all the material/tools/medium (i don't know what is the correct term) whatever you called it, it is my dear,dear,dear colour pencils, oil pastels, soft pastels, coloured pens and markers and water colours :3 I love them to infinity and beyond. To relate to the title, I have drawn an owl with graduation hat on and i dubbed this owl as 'Intelligent Owl'. This drawing is dedicated to my soon graduating sister. Tahniah!!!! Congratulations!!!

It's not perfect but still lovable :3

Last week, I went to Malacca. It was a last minute plan. 5 of us. We had fun. I had the chance to go to Muzium Kesultanan Melaka. Yes, after 21 years live as Malaysian, I finally visit the museum. We did some shopping, food hunting and sight-seeing.  I bought pareo (long piece of cloth that you can tie into various fashion). Been wanting that for so long and finally got it. Yeay me~!! I didn't really wear it though. I use it as a blanket ;P

Yesterday, I got the chance to be the emcee for prestigious MMU Awards 2013. Yeay me again :3 I've been longed to be one since I attended the last year's ceremony. Thank you to individuals that giving me this opportunity and support to pursue my small ambition. Gracias~!!! I get some compliment and  good advice from my emcee partner, Rishi, abang2 teknikal, Encik Omar, my sayang and others. Not bad for a first timer ey? My gold skirt is my mom's. (Psstt, it's her wedding skirt). I am honored to wear it on my important day Mama~! Thank you.

Me and Rishi

And the gold skirt (suits the theme: black and gold. Me on the far left)

As much as I like to be in the spotlight, I also love working backstage. Dan impian tercapai juga when I became one of the stage management crew for MMU's own Puteri Gunung Ledang Musical organize by SAKTI. Not only that, since they are shorts of extras, they want me to be the extra for a few scenes. So, I get to be on the stage and all over it. Wee! I love the experience, the good and the bad of it, the acquaintance that I made. But I still don't get the chance to hold the walkie talkie. Next event perhaps, yes.

In short, dreams come true. Alhamdulillah :3 The awesomest week evah!

Until the next post. Take care :)

Regards,
F.

So soon

I'm back~!!! Hehe... Holiday maa... and nak lepas rindu katakan. So petang tadi I exercise my right-side brain and came out with this:

Hehe.. ada banyak lagi lepas ni. These are all my university friends.

Until the next post :)

And...

XOXO,
F.

A friend: Kita nak tunjuk dia punya profile. Tapi kan awak... Dia takde la hensem tau.

Cinta tak kenal rupa. I know that is true. Be proud of your love ones. Even though dia tak berapa cantik/kacak/slim/tinggi/buff.You sure had fall for something that has more value than that :) Fret not dearies.

Hols

Assalamualaikum and greetings :)
How's everybody been doing. Things have been pretty hectic for me. I'm working on an event and I have to make sure everything runs smoothly. And I must stick to it to the end. You know me and my doing-things-halfway. I guess it is time for me to break the habit. Tension juga rasanya >.<" Like it or not I MUST do it. Wish me luck :)

Liana is going to sit for PMR tomorrow. So all the best dear Liana you have work for it and it's time for tawakal. Just remember whatever happens you have done your revision and exercises. You have done your part. Yang lain tu beserah kepada Allah. InsyaAllah kalau sudah usaha, Allah tak akan mensia-siakan usaha dan doa Liana. Same goes to other PMR-ians. Fighting! :)

Ok... Whatelse... Hmm... I've been working on a mini jigsaw puzzle. It's just bsjdjjshskdiwi. Hahaha. It trains your focus and patient and your eye-sight and anything to do with small details..hee. And I am going to complete it. Hell yeah! ^.^v

Owh that orange cat I told you in one of my previous post, yeah he never made it. But he was getting better. We took him to the vet. And the vet gave him injection and clean him up. So as we all thought, this time is going to be okay. But no, again. :,( So sad. My mom said he was good. If he wanted to eat he sat by the kitchen cabinet. And when he needs to pee he went to the toilet. Maybe he was trained by his 'family' before this. So, yeah.. He just... Died. Seriously. We think that he already being infected by virus and cannot be cured. :(

Btw his name is Awang.

And from that day on, I just don't want to take care of cat anymore. They somehow just die 'in my arms'. However, that's just only me. During the exam week mama called me and said 'hey we got a new cat' and I was like NNNNOOOO. The cat is white and so we call him Putih. Naive, cute and manja and kampung sikit. Haha. Dah besar dah kucing ni. My cousin give it to my brother. Dia yg tergedik-gedik sgt nak kucing.

I didn't bring my toolbox back. So i guess it's just going to be work, tv/movie and cooking and like always, being a housewife (a lazy one).

Alrite. That's all for this time. I'll see you in the next post.

Love,
Farhana

Say My Name

Awww... So sweet sayang. Main game pun teringat saya ^.^

Here I am again

Bersempena Royal Visit Prince William dan Kate Middleton ke Malaysia dan Sabah especially, saya persembahkan lagu...

This is my second post about them... Hehe

Tak nak cakap pasal mereka pun sebenarnya. Saja nak cakap rindu Sabah. especially Tambunan dan adik-adik di rumah anak yatim Tambunan. :') Tempatnya sejuk (lagi sejuk dari Cameron Highland) dan sangat peaceful. The last time I went to Sabah is when I was 12 years old. Waktu tu pun macam sedar tak sedar... Hahaha. Waktu kat Sabah you tend to speak like them. I have to admit susah juga la nak communicate tapi boleh juga la faham. Pegi waktu bulan puasa haritu for Sekolah@MMU Sabah II & Ihya' Ramadan. Terima kasih adik-adik kerana sudi beri kerjasama dengan abang-abang dan kakak-kakak. Penat kan puasa tapi masih semangat. Sayang adik-adik :) InsyaAllah nanti kakak visit Tambunan lagi. 

Bukan gambar tampal ye belakang tu tapi bukan gunung Kinabalu

Do you feel like blogging?

Because I do. Yes as you guess it... It's my stress time (final is around the corner). No, I'm not stress. I am stress because I'm not stress. Y U NO STRESS? Some of you think it's might be a good thing rite? It is but at times like this it is not. Anyways, I am still stress that I'm not stress. So I am stressed out. Enough.

I just cut my fingernails (itu pun nak cite) and every time I type rasa sakit kat hujung tu. Penah rasa tak? And keyboard ni tak sedap. I use keyboard spare tu since my laptop punya rosak. Masuk air... Hujan tak tutup tingkap... Aigoo. Jadi shot la kot. Huruf G, H, backspace, print screen tak leh pakai. Annoying. Rosak waktu assignment tengah melambak. Imagine my assignment tu kan tulis orang putih dan betapa banyaknya perkataan 'the' tu kena tulis. Siapkan sume dulu pastu tambah huruf H kemudiannya pakai on-screen keyboard. =.=" huuu... tapi takpe la... Damage has been done. Move on ye cik adik, move on.

I don't know what to write actually but I just feel like writing. This evening I confused lemon grass and grass jelly. I thought cincau is the lemon grass.. Whaa..??? Anyways, petang tadi, i mean for lunch i had this pasembor penang and cendol. Sedap la jugak. You guys know kan im not very fond of eating so sorry if i said it's 'sedap la jugak' when it is suppose to be 'sedap gila'.

Hmmm... What to write next? MMU boring.. Haha.. Tetibe.. Lololol. Mama ckp ni symptom tak balik rumah during the weekend. Hmmm.. Ada open house dan kononnya nak study. Konon la ada la jgk sikit. Dalam 10%?? Hee.. Huu.. Adoyai.. Ok mood please datang. Please please please i beg you. This morning my brother called and he said 'Kak Far! Ada anak kucing baru' and I was like not again... Bukan serik tapi takut sedih lagi.

Before raya ada these two kittens kat belakang rumah. Jumpa on a different day. Nama mereka Kecik & Bulat. Dua2 sudah tiada :'\ Bermula pertemuan bersama Kecik di belakang rumah, dalam longkang, right before sebelum nak buka puasa. Kesian Kecik... basah dan kesejukan. Cute face dia dan bunyi bising leads to a rescue mission. Bulat pula, duduk sendirian sambil meng-eooww pada pukul 7 pagi. Kes yang sama... muka yang comel dan bunyi bising menyebabkan kami selamatkan dia. Letak diorang sekali dalam satu box. And then we were like aaawww... adik beradik because both pun same color. Sampai sekarang tak tahu jantan ke betina. Macam too small to tell. Lolz. Kitorang ada jugak letak kat belakang rumah mana la tau mak dia datang kutip tapi kucing-kucing kat belakang tu sekor pun tak nak mengaku anak. Sheesh...

Tak tahu kenapa sayang sangat kat dua2 ekor ni. Bila pkir pemergian diorang ni boleh rasa sebak yang teramat sangat dan tidak impossible boleh menitiskan air mata. Mungkin jumpa time raya agaknya. Pemeriah suasana la katakan. Bawa balik Alor Staq tau diorg ni... haaa.. hebat tak? Kecik2 dah travel. Mungkin juga saya rasa mereka ni ada harapan untuk besar dan jadi a part of the family (they already did). Mama and abah sangat supportive. Mama siap suruh beli bottle. And they also take turn susukan the kittens. They said mcm ada anak kecik pulak. So yeah, I really want a future with the cute little kittens. Tapi apa kan daya, Allah lebih mencintai mereka. :'\

Mula2 Bulat mati dulu. Lepas tu Kecik. Tak tahu apa sebabnya. Mungkin demam kot. Memang menangis gila dan murung je hari Kecik pegi tu. I was thinking what went wrong, did I hurt them in any way and I fikir that I can't see them ever again and tak dapat tengok diorang membesar. :'\ It's very hard for me to deal with the loss and it takes sometime for me to let them go. Now ada anak kucing baru pulak. Abah jumpa dekat tgh jalan waktu nak balik ke rumah from masjid. Nasib baik tak terlanggar... ambil la bawa balik rumah. Dan hati saya meraung 'kenapa..???' hahaha.. over. Ish tak baik betul, rasa macam menyalahkan takdir pula. Astaghfirullah. So yeah, kucing baru ni warna jingga,lupa namanya apa.. Liana dah bagi nama dah. Tapi matanya tak bukak and dia tak meow sgt. Kalau eoow pun pelan je bunyi. Katanya abah nak bawa pegi vet. Hopefully everything goes well. Kucing baru ni besar sikit dari Kecik & Bulat so dah boleh bg biskut la kot. Tak kecik sangat so tak perlu la risau sangat nak bagi makan apa.. ye tak?

Esok baru nak balik rumah nak jumpa si oren. hee...

Itu saja for this post. See you in the next post.

Comel kan? Kecik

Yin and Yang. Kan dah kata adik beradik

Playing outside di Alor Star.

Dah pandai keluar box :')

Ada video lagi... Mana tak sedih.

quick post

 

Credit  to all the little ones in the picture. they take turn snapping the pictures above :)

Not perfect but still beautiful.

Updated

Assalamualaikum and greetings :)

It's been a long time no? Rindunya menulis di blog ni :') I mean in a proper paragraphs and not emotional short post. Hahaha. Well, things happen sometimes. Anyways, yeah. I've been busy lately. Ye, ni mungkin satu statement yang lame yang selalu anda dengar especially the one that are close to me. Saya busy tak tipu. :'3 The earlier weeks in mmu was hell. There were A LOT of activities. Bersepah gila! Then the following weeks so-so la. Kalau ada busy-o-meter it will be at the yellow area. Now, my mid-sem break officially start bbuuutttt I have to go to Sabah for a program: Sekolah@MMU Sabah II. Tadi tidur petang dah mimpi dah sampai Sabah :) Excited much. I have tons of thing to write especially activities during the previous sem break. Tapi tak sempat... Sedihnya kalau nak tulis balik dah tak ingat dah, ingat tajuk je. It's so sad when I cannot write in details, deliberate it. Huuu... : '\

So, here's a summary of what happen (some of it) : I made cookies for the first time. Not very nice and it was burnt. You can see smoke. Mama said it wasn't that bad and Abah ate most of it. 0.o Hungry or just want to make me feel better..? Hahaha... Okay, that's about it for my 'biskut hitam'. Hopefully I can make some more and pray to Allah that it will not burn. Hahaha. Oh yeah... And me and my sibs take the 'adventure or concern in the nature of trade' .... TEEEETTTT.. Apesal masuk ayat taxation pulak kat sini... haha. Waktu exam tak nak ingat... ok back to the story. We took the train all the way to Suria KLCC. Nak pegi Kinokuniya, the book store tu. Boleh pulak dalam banyak2 hari in this year, haritu jugelah yang dia nak tutup. 29/05/2012. Woah! Ingat. Hee :) Mungkin dia punya account close on 30th of May so yeah... accounting stuff. Kesian Liana because she's the one nak pegi sana :( Anyway, we window shopped like usual aaannnddd... went to Petrosains. Lawatan sambil belajar. Walaupun penat kami semua tetap bergembira <- ayat sekolah rendah..haha :D. Ok whatelse... okay, I finish reading a book: Mountain Between Us. One word: Superb. I really feel like I'm walking inches deep in snow, really slows down your movement. And the ending is so surprising and how do I described it...it is more than sad, you feel it really deep in your heart, touching I would say and  I literally cried. That's about it I think... Others if I happened to remember I will find my time to share it yea.

Tonight, tarawih has started which means Ramadan al-Mubarak is here~!!! :) Alhamdulillah I have the chance to meet Ramadan again and may Allah give me chance to celebrate Ramadan till the end of the month. I cannot fast for these early days because .... hence that explain why I'm here and not at the masjid :( But never mind. The good thing is I get the last 10 days insyaAllah :) Rasa terkilan juga sebenarnya sebab tak rasa sepenuhnya kedatangan Ramadan ni. Tak fully prepared lagi physically and mentally. Sibuk sangat. Rasa bersalah sangat sebab alasannya sibuk, sibuk urusan dunia... Hmmm... I don't do much for the month of Rejab and Sya'ban so yeah lagi lagi la rasa macam wasted. Hopefully Ramadan ni I will spend more time doing ibadah, jadikan urusan dunia urusan ibadah juga. Pahala berlipat-lipat kali ganda, syaitan pun takde nak ganggu ye tak..? Yang jadi penghalang dan cabarannya habit dan nafsu aje la. So let's make this Ramadan a start for good habits and starting for istiqamah for ibadah. InsyaAllah and amin to that.

Last but not least:

Happy Ramadan al-Mubarak. Let us benefit from it. Let's enjoy what we have done in this month and not regret for what we have missed.

Regards,
Farhana <3

Sekolah-sekolah

Lupa.... I forgot to thank a teacher. THANK YOU very much Asma Hani! Mama said it was you that taught me how to read. Waktu main cikgu-cikgu waktu kecik dulu. Well, it's not main-main I guess because I really can read and you scold me for real if I didn't get things correct or if I didn't behave or I didn't pay much attention. But anyhow, thanks to you I can read today. May you get pahala in each of every word I read and write and may Allah bless you sweetheart. :)

Sarangheo~~!! <3

Love,

Your sister

Selamat Hari Guru

Saya tahu sudah lambat tapi apa yang nak dirisaukan hari-hari pun hari guru (ayat cover).  Kecuali hari Sabtu dan Ahad. Eh tak, cikgu pun kena bertugas hari minggu sebab ada koko, mesyuarat, mesyuarat, mesyuarat lagi, LADAP (latihan dalam perkhidmatan), hari sukan, hari carnival keusahawanan, hari yang-saya-pun-tak-tahu-apa-namanya dan lain-lain. APA-APA pun saya ingin mengucapkan SELAMAT HARI GURU kepada guru-guru seantero dunia dan lebih-lebih lagi kepada guru-guru di Tadika Seri Ayu, SK Taman Sri Gombak, SK Seafield 3, SK USJ 12 (banyak pindah sekolah sebab nakal… tipu je) SMK USJ 13 dan pensyarah di Universiti Multimedia. Tanpa didikan, herdikan, teguran, belaian, pukulan cikgu-cikgu semua siapa lah saya. I think I turned out okay cikgu. So no worries… hahaha. Terima kasih tak terhingga saya pun tak mampu membalas jasa cikgu selama ini mengajar dan mendidik saya. Semoga cikgu-cikgu tabah menghadapi cabaran mendidik anak-anak bangsa dan mengurus dan mentadbir sekolah.

It ain’t easy I know (my mom is a teacher herself so that’s how I know). Balik rumah bersedialah untuk mendengar aduan penuh emosi dari mama saya. Curse the 40-annoying-students-in-a-class-times-a-few-other-numbers!!! (Owh I used to be them).  HAHAHAHHA… and there’s the paperwork (at one time it seems pointless), and the struggle to keep up school’s performance both academic and co-co and to achieve ‘sekolah kluster’. My mom complained that now that she feels that she work to impress people (to show the school is great) not because she wants to do it sincerely or for self satisfaction. Not that it is a bad thing but somehow you work for the reward not to get the reward. Get what I mean? Let me show you:

Work à Self satisfaction à Happy à Perform well à Reward

This how things should be, not:

Work à Reward à (in this case, not happy) à Not performing well àStress

Lebih kurang macam tu lah. I know it’s not as exact as what is written in management/human resource text book but good enough.  And what’s with the management problem and dispute among teachers, being teacher is not easy. To all the teachers going-to-be I just want to say good luck, be strong and be creative in your way of teaching. Owh, my dad once dreamed of becoming a teacher (never know that before). Anyways, dear teachers, I’m sorry if I’ve ever annoy, upset and disappoint you before. You know being a teenager, I’m not always sane and perfect all the time. Teenagers have those moments when we grow up and think that ‘why on earth I did that at school?’…hahaha :D

So yeah, teachers, keep striving in your profession. You are one of the best individuals in the world!!!

‘Sesungguhnya tinta para ulama adalah lebih baik dari darahnya para syuhada’

Love,

Your student

Hoollsss

Cepatnya.... dah habis dah first year. Rasa macam baru semalam masuk degree (ayat common...haha). Tadi angkat barang dari bilik penat gila. Mujur la bilik kat bawah sekali. Takde la seksa sangat nak mengangkut barang tu. At home at last... weeee~ seronoknya. Tak yah study kat rumah. Boleh buat benda lain. Hmm, let's see the list: reading,laundry, jaga nenek, kemas rumah, movies, sleep, eat, masak(erk), continue with my art stuff, jogging, blogging cam-whoring..hahahah( it's been a long time since I really use my baby D40). So much too do so  much time as well. So let's make this holiday worth it before I go for my next event at Sabah. So yeah, I see you around people. <|:) <---cowboy.Haha.

Love,
Farhana.

Balance

I'm quite aware that I am head over heels right now (heee). I'm also sure that everyone around me notice this as well. It's easy to tell because they come up with this remark "Amboi, bahagia dia sekarang" or "Untungla dah ada boyfriend" or "Untungla boyfriend dekat". So yeah, I'm very happy...hee :) It's nothing like I ever felt before (here's your bucket) hahahah :D. Apart from that, there is also complaint "sekarang tak nak lepak dengan kitorang dah" or "asyik berkepit je ngan bf" etcetc. Hmmm...macam mana nak explain ye kawan2... Saya admit that recently I mean lepas in relationship saya macam kurang keluar dengan kawan2 especially awak, Salis. Saya mintak maaf banyak2 kalau awak touching dengan saya. Fana tahu kita dah kurang keluar makan sama2 dah sekarang. Mungkin saya tengah ciwi lagi kot sekarang. Selalu orang kata apa "baru dapat kan". Hahaha. I have to admit la mesti kita nak keluar ngan special one kalau you get the chance kan. Kalau boleh tiap masa nak dengan dia... betul tak? (Here's your second bucket and yang ada bf/gf tu sila mengaku. thnx). So you guys, actually saya tengah cuba try balance kan masa saya spend with friends, family, special one. I really do. Kadang tu rasa bersalah jugak la bila turn down kawan punya invitation. Ampun2. And please do give me sometime to work this out (macam susah sangat je kan). Susah jugak la sebenanya sebab kalau tak handle betul2 akan timbul masalah 'touching mouching' ni...hoho. Karang kena tinggal sorang2...Haaa, waktu tu baru nak terkapai-kapai. Padan muka diri sendiri. Yela, apa2 pun family and friends come first rite? So guys, I will try my hard to spend time ample with you guys okay :) 

Love,

Farhana